Absolutions from Shark Fin Cove
By Neti Neti
Crashing —
awash with purple passion
first flow then howling
scowling at the blissful sun
Blazing —
dried up with your eyes cupped
I'm spilling and I'm sorry
enough of you evaporates
Laughing —
and I'm supposed to enjoy this?
When the foam felt like home
and your body was a mountain?
Shadows —
cascading on the gallows
I'm as salty as a seaman
I'm as holy as a harlot
Sweet siren
I don't have much time left
please whisper how I ought to try
pranayama in the ocean
It's deeper and
I get it now
It's and
deeper
I get it now
Blue bubbles
rise up
sanctity anoints my house
eyes up
I open my mouth
This is helping
This is healing
How would you describe your poetic aesthetic? What draws you to poetry?
My aesthetic is one of authenticity, sincere reflection, and manifestation brought forth. It pays homage to my identity as a raw artist not afraid to be vulnerable, be a risk-taker, or make mistakes. I strive to bring mental health into the fold through my writing style itself, which incorporates elements of my anxiety and dissociation into every aspect of my writing, from content to form. My hope is to normalize the conversations we have around mental health and around each other. I guess that’s what makes poetry so appealing; it is an apparatus through which we generate sparks of dialogue and change. It is an opportunity to alchemize my consciousness into a form that I can weave and have total autonomy over. That may be the other draw to poetry for myself—it is also a potent medicine. Having a feeling or sense of control over your surroundings and circumstances is something sparsely felt by those who cope with depression, anxiety, dissociation, or PTSD, so to put myself in a situation where I can feel my own vibrations and, in effect, make others resonate with them is art and community in its purest form.
What’s is it like being a poet in Philadelphia during this tumultuous time?
I wish not to be overly simplistic or dismissive here, but I do feel a strong need to attune myself to the world’s call of change in this age of transition, and that can look different for many people. The truth lies somewhere deeper in a series of oppressive systems that have long been felt more harshly by many communities, from black and latinx to womxn and LGBTQIA+. Coronavirus became politically weaponized which only brought the crimes of racist, patriarchal, capitalist systems further into the light, and what should have never been a political endeavor had the average American choose between science/health and bills/economics. As the virus now surges beyond a point of control, there are days where I weep, and it is important that we experience these feelings fully. After all, we are going through a time of shared trauma. But it is also a time to stand up arm and arm and fight for justice and change for people like Walter Wallace Jr.; being an artist allows a certain type of strategy to share and heal and fight as one, and we should use that strategy politically, socially, and economically anywhere we can until all people recognize healthcare (and mental healthcare) as a universal right (for starters). We have a unique opportunity to engage in a renaissance of the soul and leave this Earth in a better state than our ancestors and it will require a conscious reflection of self and intersectional engagement in our communities.
You have a chapbook coming out. Tell us about it.
Exodus is, in many ways, a love letter. It serves to navigate the stages of grief over the loss of a child, the destruction of a relationship, the dismantling of self. It asks the fervent question, ‘Where do I go from here?’ when the call of l’appel du vide brings us to the precipice. It is, of course, a commentary on mental health and of spiritual identity, exploring what is truth and what is fallacy, or relative truths that we cling to in comfort to distract or hide us from the shadows of our own ego. In many ways, Exodus is seeing my true self for the first time in a raw and vulnerable form, and I want nothing more than for people to realize that there is true freedom and comfort in that. We can dismantle our egos, we can overcome generational trauma, we are not defined by our mistakes, and every day we are discovering ourselves further and we have the opportunity to show up for ourselves deeper. What we decide to call our attention and breathe our intention into will ultimately release us, and I hope there is a soul out there who may experience my book and find comfort and community in that isolation and in that healing. For a first edition creator copy (comes with goodies!) Please feel free to DM me on Instagram (@_neti.neti_) to reserve yours. You can also pre-order a copy direct from Toho Publishing at https://www.tohopub.com/product-page/exodus-neti-neti
How do you start writing? What does your process look like when that all-possible-blank-page is in front of you?
I need my words to bleed. It needs to be an organic and fluid process, and this is not always an easy endeavor when dealing with a constant state of dissociation. I find that what works best for me is finding a way to stimulate my senses and emotions, either through an immersive experience through sound or smell. Sometimes, I am captured by small phrases or soundbites while walking in the wilderness that I’ll compile into my notes, and other times I can regurgitate an entire limerick in a state of lyrical flow. I also tend to use that anxiety and dissociation in my writing process to reclaim that power and identity for myself, and the silver lining can oftentimes yield a very nuanced yet unique voice to my writing. There are days when I feel empty, and it is important to extend yourself grace in these moments so you can return, ready to write, with a fuller cup. There is beauty and joy in rest, but engaging your mind with writing prompts can also help.
As a writer, what would you choose as your mascot/avatar/spirit animal. Why?
What a fun question! Of course, I have interpretations as to what my spirit animal is as a person, but as a writer I would have to say a corvid (Crow, Raven family) but not for the reasons you may think! Of course, I’m an Edgar Allan Poe fan, but the spiritual connection may lie somewhere closer to the crow’s ‘trolling’ behavior! These birds tend to stalk and hop behind larger predators and peck at their backsides! The thought process here is an evaluation of larger predators or a means to steal food, but oftentimes they do this with no gain other than a social curiosity or commentary. For me, I’m able to view this behavior from a more light-hearted capacity to suggest that we can take on our own ‘predators’, namely the overarching thought processes and negative coping mechanisms that inhibit our ability to flourish. Not only can we peck away at these creatures to show that they hold no true power over our minds and bodies, but we can do so confidently, and God forbid, maybe with a little humor.
Where can readers find more of your work?
For now, I encourage others to share space with me through my instagram, @_neti.neti_ . I do encourage everyone to stay tuned as I produce more published content, I should have a website of my own up and running shortly I am also working on relaunching my Creator Series, which seeks to highlight and promote artists of all kinds in the local area while supporting Philly nonprofits. I am reevaluating the impact and efficacy of this program and would like to bring it back as a more powerful space than it was before! As this is the last question of the interview I would like to thank you again, John, for honoring me with this opportunity to interview in a space like Mad Poets that houses and highlights some truly talented and inspirational voices; it was an absolute pleasure!
Neti Neti is a Philadelphia-based poet focused on processing trauma and communal healing through allegory, symbolism, and imagery. He uses his dissociation and anxiety as a writing technique—evident in his sudden shifts in meter and airy subject matter—to empower identity rather than suppress it. He has a debut chapbook, Exodus, and has been featured in Toho Publishing as well as Yes Poetry. He is a spiritual pilgrim and a harbinger of endtimes.
Catfish” John Wojtowicz grew up working on his family’s azalea and rhododendron nursery in the backwoods of what Ginsberg dubbed “nowhere Zen New Jersey.” Currently, he works as a licensed social worker and adjunct professor. He has been featured in the Philadelphia based Moonstone Poetry series, West-Chester based Livin’ on Luck, Mad Poets Society, and Rowan University’s Writer’s Roundtable on 89.7 WGLS-FM. Find out more at: www.catfishjohnpoetry.com